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Thursday, March 30, 2000 At work, we spend a lot of time dealing with taxonomies or simply categorizing information. An example of a popular taxonomy is Yahoo’s categories for information on the Internet.
Earlier today, Alina pointed me to Singapore’s new local street directory. The street directory is a useful service created mainly for residents to But, what caught my attention was the "Entertainment" category. Apparently, the best way to define entertainment in Singapore is with "Night Clubs" and "Escorts." Wednesday, March 29, 2000 I've been checking Sarah's website like five times a day everyday for the last week. I'm waiting for her SXSW 2000 report, but she keeps delaying it. Maybe the pressure of a link will get her to put it up sooner. Come on girl, I know life in Hawaii is slow, but... Ahhhh, there is nothing like fresh waffles topped with strawberries, banana and real maple syrup for breakfast. I'm on vacation. Well, not really. I'm working everyday, but Amy and my parents went on vacation. Not together, but to different places. Amy is in Mexico and my parents are in the Dominican Republic. So, I'm on vacation from them. Nice coincidence, isn't it? I would prefer that they went away at different times. Then Amy and I could have played house for a week. Still, it's nice to have the house to myself. I blast music, eat and sleep when I want without concern for others. I even leave the lights on in rooms I'm not in. You would think I would walk naked from the shower to my bedroom, but I don't out of habit. Breakfast and living alone is great, but I need to go wash the dishes now. Tuesday, March 28, 2000 I think I'm starting to get it. I'm not supposed to judge them, label them, make them last longer or rush them away. I'm just supposed to make friends with them. Yeah, that's it, just make friends with them. Excuse me while I go make friends with my feelings. Friday, March 24, 2000 I went to another bris this morning. I made sure not to stand where I could see the action. I cringe when I hear the baby cry at the moment of snip-snip. I'll try to be conscious during my own son's bris, assuming I have at least one son. I don't want to add to all the negative information about DSL on the Internet, but I don't want to be quiet about it either. I placed an order with Flashcom the first week of February. On February 7th, I received on a confirmation via e-mail that my order was processed and a $100 deposit was taken from my credit card. So it's been 46 days and I still haven't heard a peep from Flashcom. I called them up an hour ago. They have been trying to cancel my order. They flipped the sequence of two credit card numbers. Nobody called me. The order just sat there. Hopefully, I won't have to wait another 47 days to get it installed. On the other hand, my brother ordered Bell Atlantic Infospeed DSL last week and he is already using it. I should have called Flashcom much sooner. They'll be hearing from me at least twice a week until I get it installed. I sometimes feel like my parents are younger than me in head and heart years. Wednesday, March 22, 2000 I'm working late and staying over in Princeton, again. I did the same on Monday night. But, on Monday night there was a Purim party on Princeton University's campus. Inna's klezmer band, The Klez Dispensers was playing. Chris joined me. I think it was his first Purim party and the first time he's held a gragger.
Tuesday, March 21, 2000 Overheard this morning: "I figure I can read the menu as long as I eat at home," in reference to flirting with another girl when you have a significant other at home. Oksana informed me of the Russian way to say it: "If I'm on a diet, it doesn't mean I can't look at the menu." Monday, March 20, 2000 Amy has a P fetish! That’s right, she has a P fetish. Every time she sees any, she has to play with them. She does it when we're alone, but she’ll even do it in front of her family. I wanted to keep it a secret, but I can’t anymore. I got a camera and caught her in action. Shhhh, don't tell her. When I was in Singapore I took a few pictures of toilets. Well, not the kind I'm used to, but the ones that look like holes in the ground. I was randomly browsing and found "How to use a Japanese style toilet" from Jejune.net. I'm still cracking up from it. Continuing on the toilet theme, "A Woman's Guide on How to Pee Standing" (via brig). I've always said that was possible. I first heard about it in high school on Z100's Love Phones, which they no longer do. A Z100 caller said she had her pants tailored so her zipper opened lower to allow her to pee standing. At work, we are nearing the end of Phase 1 of development. The deadline is Wednesday, so working on my SXSW trip journal has been delayed. Meanwhile, take a look at Abdul's (the high-tech teddy bear) adventures at SXSW 2000. Sunday, March 19, 2000
Friday, March 17, 2000 My parents out out dancing and partying at a Russian restaurant with friends and relatives. I'm heading out the door to join them. But, first, let me share an article Alina found: Kenyan women protest at drinking dens, demand sex. I'm so not dressed for the snow today. I'm still in Austin-clothes mode. I was sporting my blogger t-shirt earlier, but it's too cold now.
Last night I had dinner and tea with Amir and Inna. Amir got a Canon QV-3000ex, a new digital camera that came out this week. Here is the damage from last night. While you look at those pictures, I'm going to work on some others. Wednesday, March 15, 2000 I am home. Sleep is the only thing on my mind besides reruns of the SXSW marathon I ran the last four days. The cameras are fixed as of now. My ISP was having problems (again) and I couldn't fix it from Texas. |
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Sunday, March 12, 2000 I'm enjoying my time in Texas. I'm taking pictures and keeping notes. I want to share them with you, but it's time consuming to edit, crop and write good stuff. I can hardly find any time to get on a computer between sleep, eating, work, conference sessions and parties. Woe is me! :) However, something will be up soon... Meanwhile, check out pictures from pb and comments from bradlands and Matt Haughey. Thursday, March 9, 2000 I heard about the South by Southwest conference last year. This year I thought everybody was going except for me. Now, I'm happy to say that I'm going, too. Woohoo! Onclave is sending my coworker Todd and me to Austin, TX from Saturday to Wednesday. There are definitely things going on there that are work related. If you will be there and want to hook up or invite me to a party :) then drop me a line. I'll be staying at the Holiday Inn (which I was told is close to the conference center). Someone (who wants to remain anonymous) pointed me to a site I never knew existed. In case you were considering getting busy with a youngin' you should probably check out AgeOfConsent.com (warning: the site's advertising links to Adult toys). You can find the laws for US states, abroad and for travelers between countries. I didn't know it, but it turns out there are different age requirements for hetero and same-sex relationships. Amy: "Who needs money when you have kisses?" Wednesday, March 8, 2000 When I woke up this morning I felt as though yesterday was ages ago. I had interesting dreams last night, too. I was giving hugs to and feeling compassion for old college roomates and friends. I think that I have been out of touch too much and that's a sign for me to reconnect with a few. A phrase that gets repeated in my head lately: "Rest in the nature of alaya." I just realized the words slut and lust use the same four letters. It's not enough that we have to worry about Repetitive Strain Injuries, now there is Computer Vision Syndrome. I planned on going snowboarding this past weekend at Ski Windham. I brought my Airwalk boots with me and was ready to rent a board when they told me they only have hard bindings. So, instead trying to board with their boots and bindings, I rented myself some snowblades. I like them a lot better than skiing. I think snowblading is the least physically demanding downhill snow sport. But, I will be going back to snowboarding. A fundamental rule: if it's not clear in the designer's head, it won't be clear in the design. I've starting running again (yes, I stopped for a while) and now I've found another motivating reason. If one of these guys grabs my cellphone (yeah, I succumbed and got one) I'll be able to catch them and take them down. Or maybe it's a blessing and I'll let them have it. (link found via Weblog Nation) Monday, March 6, 2000 I think my friend, Oksana, looks like Andie MacDowell, but I need to find a better picture of Oksana to show it. Oksana, send me something. Today is Max's first day at work. Amy asked me why "We need the equivalent of car blinkers for human bodies." I think it would be useful if people had a visual indicator that said, "Woah, watch out, something is wrong with me, stay away, I'm in a bad mood," or "I may explode at any moment," or "I'm treading on sensitive ground, the person I'm talking to or thinking about (e.g. the car in front of me) isn't behaving in a predictable manner and that's going to affect my ability to do the same." Friday, March 3, 2000 We need the equivalent of car blinkers for human bodies. Monday, February 28, 2000 Brig ordered noise canceling headphones. According to Sony, the headphones’ circuit "senses outside noise with built-in microphones and sends an equal-but-opposite canceling signal to the headphones." Don't you find it strange that we have to to create noise to cancel out noise? The headphones even have a "Hot Line Switch" so you can press a button to interrupt the drowning of external noise long enough to hear your coworker say something to you. It sounds like a good way to decrease unnecessary interruptions by creating blocks to communication. To talk to you, someone not only has to get your attention and stop your train of thought, but now they make you push a button, too. Kind of like granting permission: "your words may now enter my ears." Speaking of noise, what do you know about noise pollution? I often hear people say (and even say it myself): "Do you feel comfortable telling me about this?" But, does anyone ever say: "Do you feel comfortable listening to me say this?" Saturday, February 26, 2000 It's turns out last month a Lehigh student and alum were both on "Who wants to be a millionaire?" one day apart. Both walked away with some money and both are members of Psi Upsilon fraternity. Go Lehigh! More positive-is-better research: "If you harbor feelings of hopelessness, you may be at higher risk for high blood pressure than people with a more positive outlook," from InteliHealth. Friday, February 25, 2000 Yes, I love to dance. :) Steve found the perfect auction demonstrating how to legally sell tickets above face value on the Internet. The current bid for a "Bic ball point pen (blue ink)" is $172.50. The pen comes with a free ticket to The Cure concert. Thursday, February 24, 2000 My Internet Service Provider had security problems for the last two days. My computer wasn't able to update the webcam images and I wasn't able to tell you about it. It was a weird phenomenon to actually have the urge to write something and not be able to share it with you. Usually, I have the technical ability to share, but I lack something I think is worth sharing. Wednesday, February 23, 2000 Dancing is safe sex. |
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Tuesday, February 22, 2000 A lot of people say they never like hearing bad news. I don't think that's true. Tonight I heard about some difficulties a friend is having in her relationship. I know it's not very nice or compassionate, but part of me felt good hearing it. I wish the best for my friend, but sometimes it's good to hear about another's trouble because it reminds you that you're doing something right. Tonight, I got reminded not to take for granted some of the good that I have. We need that feeling more often than we usually get it. Though, I should probably find a way to feel that way without having to think of or hear about bad situations. Even Jakob Neilsen thinks work isn't a separate part of our life: "But why is it bad to integrate work life and home life? On the contrary, one could argue that it is an unhealthy deviation from human nature to designate a special location as the 'office' and insist that all work take place there. In most of human history, people lived and worked in the same location and work efforts and leisure activities were intertwined. The need to have assembly line workers report to a central factory to crank out Model Ts is the only reason we temporarily had the notion of work being a separate part of life. Industrial era concept."Todd, a coworker at Onclave, told me that having a girlfriend that can write is a double-edged sword. Apparently, when a relationship ends with writer, there is all sorts of inspiration for her to write. She could write vicious letters, bitter poetry and maybe even a vengeful song. Great. Monday, February 21, 2000 I think a lot about the experience readers' of my web site have. The saying: "beauty is in the eye of the beholder," sums it up. When you read what I write, you control meaning and interpretation while I only slightly influence it. After you have developed an internal interpretation of my writing, your mind moves to the next steps. Most likely judgment, acceptance, rejection, contemplation or laughter occur after reading. That would be a hopeful response, as opposed to indifference. :) That leads to a few realizations. I don't have control over your past, biases or point of view. Therefore, I don't have complete control over what you think of me. Sometimes I catch myself wanting to write something personal, but hesitating because of how you might interpret it and judge me. But, why care? It doesn't matter in the end. I could build up that fear forever and never express myself. You may judge and reject, but if I don't try you may never contemplate or laugh either. All who express take that risk. (Thanks brig for writing the inspiration for this expression.) I haven't had any luck finding affordable Cure tickets. My friend Chris recommended I try to get some at the door the day of the concert. He also told me The Cure will be on Conan O'Brien the 29th of February. I would venture the idea that your life's passion should be your work is as old as the word "work." Peter Merholz found an interview with Richard Saul Wurman, the man who coined the term "Information Architect" before I was born. In that interview Richard says: "The term 'work' to me is a pejorative term. If you have to do something you don't like it's called work. Ditch diggers do work. You do work, work, work so you can take a vacation. So vacation and work have become opposites. As opposed to the idea that work is joy. As a designer, I think that the big design problem is designing your life. And if that's what you mean by hobby and that's what I mean by hobby, then my work is a collection of hobbies and things I want to do, that's part of designing your life."Valentine's Day 2000 has come and gone, but I haven't heard a word in the media about e-commerce flower sites' inabilities to fulfill orders for Monday, February 14. I tried to order flowers from FTD, Proflowers.com and 1-800-Flowers.com. I thought these sites would take the orders and send the instructions to local florists who would deliver the flowers to happy girl. Well, they don't do that, instead they take the order, prepare the flowers on their own and ship them via FedEx or some other carrier. Since Valentine's Day fell on a Monday this year and they wanted to ensure the freshness of the flowers, two of the sites I tried refused to deliver on Monday and one asked for an extra ten dollars to do it. All three recommended I ship for Saturday so happy girl could enjoy the flowers for the whole weekend. Of course, I wanted my flowers to arrive on the right day so all of happy girl's coworkers could gawk. I proudly gave my business to a local florist that I found on Bigbook after I skipped all the promotions recommending I use the big sites for my flower needs. Didn't anybody notice that problem besides me? Saturday, February 19, 2000 When driving, have you ever turned right at a green light and then seen the red light for the cars going in the perpendicular direction and think, "Woops, did I just run a red light?" EBay removed my auction requesting two tickets to the Cure concert. Not like it matters, plenty of individuals have now put up auctions of tickets. Legally, you are not allowed to sell tickets above the face value. So, what is the loophole? People are selling a Cure CD or poster to go with the tickets so they can claim the extra money is for that extra item. The bad thing about linking to EBay is that the auctions end and soon after the links become useless. Friday, February 18, 2000 I'm looking for two tickets to the Cure concert at the Roseland Ballroom on Monday, February 28, 2000. Yes, I like The Cure. Wednesday, February 16, 2000 More pictures from our Vermont trip, courtesy of Amir (where did you get that picture of me?--put your mouse over 'friends'). Tuesday, February 15, 2000 The most important factor in choosing a girlfriend in this new Internet age is writing talent. Let me tell you, you'll be exchanging just as many emails with her as phone calls, if not more. If you find one that can write... ecstasy in email! By the way, I'm staying in Princeton tonight. In fact, I'm sleeping in the same building I work in. No, it's not the typical work-like-mad-startup experience (yet). I work in a house. :) Monday, February 14, 2000 The turkey went over well with my co-workers. I want to find a way to get some without driving to Lehigh. I get this weird pleasure from feeding other people. I think I inherit that from my mom. I find it inspiring to create for others the stuff that enables them to live, breath and smile. I like writing here. Lately my entries have been spurring discussion over e-mail with my friends. That is meaningful to me. I like sharing part of myself and hearing of a connection with one of you. Although, I do not get a chance to instantly respond to everything, I think we both benefit from the exchange. I'm investigating effective ways to enable you to share that expression with others in addition to me, a la Max's philosophical discussions or other ways. Maybe you should consider creating a place on the Internet to share your thoughts, latest links and unique perspective on yourself and the world. I think the best tool to date for doing that is Blogger. Blogger doesn't work on its own, you still need to find a place to store your site like Geocities, Tripod or AOL Hometown. Michal Wallace and I have briefly discussed over e-mail how to be more productive and coax ourselves into productive states of mind. Well, he's done most of the discussing, I've just been giving food for thought. He wrote up some of his thoughts in coding in flow, part II. Oh, and Happy Valetine's Day! Would you believe this is the first year I have an official valentine that happens to be my girlfriend, lives in the same hemisphere as me and is raised in the same religion? Sunday, February 13, 2000 Amy and I got back from Glasbern today. We had lots of fun, rest, relaxation, bad movies and too much food. I highly recommend Glasbern, which started out as a Bed & Breakfast, but has become more like a Country Inn. Thanks go out to Ron Ticho for the recommendation. By the way, Nawab is the Indian restaurant we ate at near Lehigh. The food quality isn't that great, but that's where I learned to master the north Indian menu. I have a loyalty to Nawab, although, my favorite tall waiter that always remembered my name (as Ewon) is no longer there. Oh, and I brought home two pounds of garlic pepper turkey from The Goose. That turkey is part of my favorite Goosey sandwich called the "New New New." I ate that sandwich while chatting with a friend I haven't spoken to in way too long. The following was part of an e-mail I received Saturday from Intelihealth: Optimism And LongevityNow, how does one move from pessimism to optimism? One can dedicate a life of study and self-analysis to the transition or one can get it over with and make the transition without a life-long dedication. As Nike says, Just do it. I like that phrase. Just do it. Friday, February 11, 2000 Please excuse my unclear writing; yes, technically, we are not born alone (we have a mother) and we don’t necessarily die alone. However, you and I are the one doing the dying and borning. :) Michael Morgan wrote to inform me that One sung by Aimee Mann was actually "written by Harry Nilsson and recorded by a band called Three Dog Night." I found that a group called Filter also recorded the song on the X-Files Movie Soundtrack. Tonight I’m heading into PA to chill with Amy at a Bed&Breakfast not far from Lehigh University. In fact, I plan on giving a Lehigh tour to Amy. We’ll make sure to visit my favorite lunch and dinner places. That would be Goosey Gander II for lunch and oh geez, I forgot the name of the Indian food place off-campus for dinner. Thursday, February 10, 2000 I am learning a new web development environment for work today. The tutorial instructed me to write something to demonstrate a feature. This is what came out of my head: Liberty and freedom, there is a difference between the two, but most people don't know what it is.I just thought I’d share that with you. After further research, I learned that dictionaries don't agree with me, but I think among "spiritual literature," that is the view. By the way, a new Cure CD called Bloodflowers is being released on Tuesday. |
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Wednesday, February 9, 2000 When we are born, we do it alone. When we die, we do that alone. The following lyrics have been in my head lately: One is the loneliest numberThose lyrics are from a song by Aimee Mann called One. I first heard it in Magnolia, which I've seen twice already. Amy gave me the soundtrack and I must say, the music and movie are inseparable. I highly recommend you see it. Magnolia is so extensive that everyone gets something different out of it. Everything we see on the screen is a reflection of our fears and hopes. Magnolia pulls our emotions out of us, which makes watching it an intense experience. Ahhhhhhh, a two-minute drive to work today... I stayed at the Princeton University dorms last night. It was like being back in college. About an hour after falling asleep, I heard loud ringing. I woke up surprised and try to shut off the clock radio, but it wouldn't go off. Inna proceeded to tell me it was the fire alarm, not the clock radio. I rushed to put my own clothes on (after grabbing her jeans first) and went outside to wait with other college students in freezing weather. Ten minutes later we were let back in and I went to sleep. Tuesday, February 8, 2000 I read something amusing today in an Internet World article about web personalization: "When you ask somebody for a lot of personal information, you have the right to expect that they're actually going to use that information." He [Harley Manning] recounts some research by Forrester colleague Paul Hagen. According to Manning, Hagen registered at the online drugstore PlanetRX and indicated in his profile that he was allergic to aspirin.Some web designers do have life and death responsibilities. Friday, February 4, 2000 We each have a unique purpose and passion in our lives. The work we give our heart to is a unique expression of ourselves. We all search to find what this expression is and a livable way to do it. Joining an Internet startup is an invitation to those of us looking to find and work our passion. It is a misleading invitation. The promise of an Internet startup is the modern equivalent to the Holy Grail. I suspect most people do not find their passion in such a startup, particularly when joining others' startups. Startup opportunities will always seem promising, yet the industry is learning. But, what's wrong? What's wrong is that we look to risk, adrenaline, IPOs, long hours, self-sacrifice and rushing to nowhere important because we really don't know what our life's passion is. I don't know what mine is. Monday, January 31, 2000 I would like to write more on this site. But, work is moving quickly in to production mode so I need to spend more time there, especially if I want quality to be important. I need to do important but not urgent work before urgency becomes dominating. I already don't give the time I need and want to personal e-mail. Those constraints combined with me trying to write something of substance and interest every time makes for few entries here. So, let's talk about snow and commuting. I drove without listening to music or tapes today. Today my commute was more fun than usual because of the snow on my car. My windows were clear of snow, but the rest of my car wasn't. I liked watching the snow on the hood of my car fly in to the air while sometimes smacking into my windshield and land on the ground behind me. Sometimes I would accelerate and make sharp turns just to get the snow off my hood. What I liked the most, though, was watching snow from the tops of cars in front of me fly into the air and glide towards my windshield. I challenged myself not to blink or skip a heartbeat while this significant (yet harmless) object flies at me and breaks on my windshield. And at one point, I had to slam on my breaks and all the snow from my roof slid onto my windshield. Then the wipers pushed it to the sides (surprise!). A few minutes after that, I noticed this block of ice jammed on the right side of my windshield. It was sliding up and down with the wipers. The edge of the wiper would push up, and then gravity would pull it down. The edge of the wiper would push up, and then gravity would pull it down. The edge of the wiper would push up, and then gravity would pull it down and so on. Eventually, I managed to stop its hypnotizing effect on me by accelerating while the wiper pushed it up which caused it to slide on to my roof and off my car. I'm clever. Snow on my car and the laws of physics amuse me on the way to work. Does reading this amuse you? Thursday, January 27, 2000 Comedy Night was fun. Two friends of mine showed up, but they found out about it on their own. Nobody showed up from my invitations via e-mail and my web site. Go figure. What was I expecting? :) Do you think we each have an unlimited amount of creative energy? I feel as though there is a fixed amount of creative thinking, synthesis and expression that I can do in a day. I wonder how journalists do it everyday. By the way, if on one of my webcams you see a picture of the other webcam, then blame my father. He doesn't like the camera pointed at him while he uses my computer. That is fine with me. The problem is he doesn't turn it back so you can stare at my bookcase instead of the other camera (since the bookcase is more interesting than the camera). Speaking of my webcams, the first time I skimmed the Las Vegas Weekly article in which I was included, I missed something. Amy brought my attention to what Bingo Barnes wrote: "While some make a conscious effort to try to forget about the camera's presence, it's impossible to forget you're being watched. Freydenson says that while he has become less concerned with his appearance, weird ticks, or hand movements, he plays on the fact that his hands often find their way near his nose, but not into it. He always catches himself before the mining expedition takes place. It has now become a game for his fans to try to screen capture images of him picking his nose. Some have gotten close, but so far, no gold."I had no idea that was going on. Tuesday, January 25, 2000 The fundraising group I volunteer for is hosting a comedy night fundraiser this Thursday. If you are in the area, I invite you to come enjoy yourself and support a good cause. Here is the information: Young Leadership of the Russian Division of the UJA-Federation of New York presents Comedy Night Live II Thursday, January 27, 2000 at 8:00 PM130 East 59th Street New York City Ballroom, 2nd Floor Featuring comics seen on The David Letterman Show, The Tonight Show, Comedy Central, HBO and Top NYC Clubs Cover is $20 and there will be a Cash Bar For more information call (212) 836-1537 * All proceeds will go to the UJA-Federation of New York Around 1 PM this afternoon, the snowplow finally came and cleaned our street. It seems our street is cleaned at the whim of the drivers of the snowplow. I think since a dead-end street is not on the path to another street, the drivers sometimes forget to clean it. Nevertheless, they did today.
Now I think the stock will correct itself. Once they learn that I designed this thing and how it was implemented, they'll realize there aren't enough servers in the world to handle the load that using DFC requires. I will visit OurBeginning.com during and after the Super Bowl to see what happens. Las Vegas Weekly interviewed me for an article about webcams. The author quoted me about why I like having a personal site. I'll Show You Mine is the title of the article; you need to look a few paragraphs below the picture of me to see my quote. I wanted to drive to Princeton this morning, but the snow kept me in Fair Lawn. Maybe I'll drive down later tonight. Inna is letting me stay in her Princeton dorm room until she comes back from break.
A while ago, my friend Senya told me of a study Deepak Chopra did with two sets of rabbits. Experimenters fed both sets of rabbits with food that was full-of-fat and rather unhealthy. On that food, they predicted the rabbits could live about a month. The difference in the two sets of rabbits was how they were fed. With the first set, they threw food in each rabbit's cage. With the second set, they sat and held each rabbit while petting and hand-feeding them the same food as the first set. It turned out the first set of rabbits died in two weeks. The second set, that received all that holding and affection, lived for months. The study tells me how much affection and intention change digestion. So, since I don't think cookies are a healthy breakfast, I'm hoping that because I felt as though I was eating an expression of love, I did my body good. :) Sunday, January 23, 2000 I'm happy. Amy baked me cookies. Wednesday, January 19, 2000 I went to the funeral of my friend's grandmother on Sunday. At the funerals I have been to someone speaks about the life of the deceased. I think the speaker works hard before the funeral to learn about the person who died to paint a positive light on the deceased's life. I always get teary-eyed or cry during that speech. But, what really bothers me is that I have to wait for someone to die to hear his or her amazing story. Everybody has a unique and touching story. Apparently, I was (and am) related to amazing people and I had no clue. Only at their funerals did I learn about their unique talents and lifelong struggles. It is my fault I don't take the time to get to know the special part of people. I have been surprised many times before when I saw straight to the deep core of my friends and relatives. I believe that everyone has a sensitive and beautiful core. But, I have to drop preconceived notions to see it. When I succeed at that simple task, then that day is beautiful. Why? Because I am beautiful and I have a sensitive and beautiful core, too. How pretentious of me. Well, I wouldn't be able to experience any one else's beauty if I didn't have my own. Duh! Saturday, January 15, 2000 A Lehigh classmate, Chris Stengel, is visiting Fair Lawn tonight. We are going to have a little gathering at my house with Amy, Anna, Marina, Dave Grossman, Dave Tiomkin, Max and others. Chris told me he wanted to see Fair Lawn (not that there is much to see) and to finally meet "everybody you write about on your web site." Thursday, January 13, 2000 Here is another shovel of shovelware. During my high school years, I chatted a lot on the computer. I wrote about it in college. I think "Addicted to Chat" entertains and reveals my past chatting motivations. |
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Wednesday, January 12, 2000 You know what else I liked about Vermont? Well, most of the time, I am in the same place with the same people. Sometimes I am in the same place with new people and sometimes in a new place with new people. Yeah, yeah, so what’s the big deal? Usually, my friends and I spend time together at parties and dinners. By going to Vermont, we moved from same people same place to same people new place and this time we had to live together. We had to shop and cook together. We had to ski together. We even had to hike together. Believe me, hiking together was difficult. There were individuals with different experience levels. There were individuals in completely different shape. We left late so we were rushing to be done before sundown. In the past, I learned from experienced hikers to walk single file, to be quiet and to leave nature as it was before I came. I imposed my learning on fellow hikers even though I knew they never learned the same thing. Well, I did not actually do any imposing. This was just my own internal struggle. Eventually I let go. I let go of my expectations. I always have a better time when I let go of my expectations. In the case of the whole Vermont trip, it was easy. I was so busy working that I didn’t have much time to set any expectations. I told Max long ago (and I only remember because of what he said back to me--thank you Max), disappointment is just missed expectations. When I am conscious of it, I don’t wallow in my disappointment. I examine my expectations. Saturday, January 8, 2000 Thursday night I met with Nazir. He is from Singapore and a close friend of Alina’s. In the summer of 1998, I visited Alina and South East Asia for six weeks. I flew, by myself, to spend time with Alina and her friends and family. I have not been back since. In fact, lately I have not been thinking or talking about the experience much. Until I had dinner with Nazir, I thought it was a dream. When he came and we started talking about everyone I met, the feelings involved and the things we did, my dream came back to life again. See, the trip was my experience. Nobody in this country shared it with me. I left, I lived and I came back. There are no restaurants, malls, or people to remind me. I have pictures and writing, but nothing significant to make the feelings from the experience come back. I have to work harder to remember, at least, until someone real comes and triggers my emotions. I will go back one day. Tuesday, January 4, 2000 What a life the cats I am taking care of live. They sleep, they eat, and they go outside, play and get dirty. They come inside, eat, clean themselves, clean me, nap, walk all over my papers, sniff my food, step all over my laptop, chase the mouse cursor on my screen, rub themselves against the corner of my laptop screen, drink some water, walk all over me, leave hair all over my clothes, eat and then go back to sleep. No wonder they are blissful animals. I read a feature last night in Civilization magazine about Buddhism taking over the west. I learned that the book I just read, Ethics for the New Millennium, was a NY Times top seller for nine weeks and second on the top business books list for six weeks. The book is currently fifth on the business list. I didn't expect it considering the book is 1) about responsible and ethical behavior and 2) written by The Dalai Lama. For those of you traveling in and around New Jersey on a bus or train, NJ Transit's schedules might be a useful bookmark. Monday, January 3, 2000 I like this: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."I Ask(ed) Jeeves who to attribute and got a good answer. I am staying in Princeton until Thursday and taking care of my coworker's cats. The two-minute walk to work will help me keep my sanity. Marina took great pictures from last week's Vermont trip. Max scanned, cropped and put the pictures on his web site. Saturday, January 1, 2000 Happy New Year! The party is over and it went well. A few minutes after midnight all the power went out in the house. People were screaming and laughing. We were happy something finally happened. Well, that was until we realized that someone went into the garage and flipped off the power switches. So, as far as I can tell, nothing bad happened. What a disappointment, no? I think most of us were expecting something. Maybe Monday we will learn of some business blunders. My friends and I will find the best images from the webcast and put them on-line this weekend. If you had a chance to watch, thanks for visiting. |
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